Mountain Highs & Valley Lows: A Wrestler’s Perspective

By Carson Beebe – retired college wrestler, pro MMA fighter. Current youth wrestling & MMA fight team coach.

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As a wrestler looks back on his career it is defined by momentous mountain tops and soul crushing valley lows. Rarely, if ever, does he remember the moments in between.

Wrestlers are warriors. We are masters of sacrifice. From the gruelling workouts, to cutting weight, to getting physically beat up in the room, we embrace the pain. It is because of this great sacrifice that our victories are so fulfilling and our defeats hurt so deep.

I started wrestling when I was four years old. After wrestling in college, I continued my athletic career in MMA. At the heart of it I am, and always will be, a wrestler. Wrestling has shaped into the person I am today. As I look back on my career I can clearly point out the mountain tops and the valley lows. Through all the ups and downs, maybe the greatest lesson wrestling has taught me is how to persevere through it all. Never, ever quit. Ever!

The Mountain Top

One mountain top that I can vividly remember was when I won a big fight in Las Vegas. I had been busting my butt trying to build my MMA career since transitioning from college wrestling. I had 21 fights in two and a half years and I won 18 of them. That is a pretty insane pace for most fighters but for a wrestler it’s normal.

It was the summer of 2013 and I was given the opportunity to fight for a big promotion on a big stage at the famous Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada! Even more, the fight was booked for the day after my birthday. The stage was set. I had no doubt this was going to be a birthday to remember.

My opponent was very tough – an undefeated BJJ specialist from California. Too add to the gravity of the moment, two weeks before the fight I had a brutal tooth infection. The doctor recommended emergency surgery to get 4 teeth pulled. Before he could even say it, I made it very clear there was zero chance I was pulling out of the fight.

The surgery made cutting weight very difficult. I couldn’t spar, wrestle, or run for 5 days after due to the bleeding. I couldn’t take any pain killers either because I was going to get drug tested by the athletic commission. On top of that I was walking into a punching contest with four fresh holes in my jaw. The pain and suffering was real.

After enduring the misery that cutting weight always brings, and then some, I made the weight (my brother helped a lot). The fight itself was a gruelling 3 round battle that took every ounce of energy and grit that I had to give. In the final round I got caught in a tight armbar. I heard my elbow pop but I refused to tap. Quitting is just not in my nature (I still can’t curl a dumbbell with that arm). After the final bell rang we went to the judges. I won a decision 29-28. It was a close fight and a huge win!

The next day the gravity of my accomplishment sunk in. I was sitting pool-side at the glamorous Hard Rock Hotel. I had a stack of cash in my pocket from the win bonus, and I was surrounded by all my favorite people – my fiancé (looking good as ever in her bikini), my family (who made the trip) and my closest friends (who were also my training partners). I owed a lot to these people. Everyone was eating, drinking, and celebrating but I didn’t need any alcohol. No drug or drink could have matched the high I was already on. I was floating on pure happiness.

I felt so grateful for the opportunity to pursue my passion for combat sports in such an amazing setting. I was grateful for my fiancé sticking by my side through all the misery, for my family and their never-ending support, and for my friends who helped me prepare for battle. I knew I didn’t get here alone. I felt humbled by the moment and all the love and support. I felt gratification that the last 15 years of hard work, cutting weight, and gruelling workouts were all worth it.

The mountain tops feel the greatest when a tremendous amount of hard work and sacrifice comes first. If it were easy the moment wouldn’t feel so special. It is in these moments we need to be humble and grateful. Great achievements are never done alone. “It takes a village…” Always give praise to those who gave you the support when you needed it most. Be grateful and give the glory where the glory is due. For me, I give all the glory to God.

The Valley Low

Looking back a bit further, I was 12 years old when my older brother won our family’s first state title. Growing up with four brothers, wrestling was the cornerstone of my family. Two of my older brothers went on to win 4 high school state championships each (a record I think). The bracket boards were displayed proudly on our living room walls. Since that day, my #1 goal in life was to win a state bracket board like my brothers.

In high school I made it to the semifinals of state 3 years in a row. My senior year, after falling short three times before, I was ready to finally get my bracket board. I put in the work, I beat all the top ranked guys in my bracket, and I had a very winnable match in the semifinals. But I choked.

Mentally I just shut down. I can’t really explain it. It was like I forgot everything I knew about wrestling. The pressure I put on myself, the countless sleepless nights visualising that bracket board in my hands… it all got to me. I cracked under the pressure. I lost a close match in the semifinals for the third year in a row and officially failed to reach my goal of becoming a high school state champion.

I will never forget the moment after the match in the tunnel at Assembly Hall in Champaign, IL. I was sitting there totally broke. With tears streaming down my face, my coach sitting right by my side. He was at a loss for words. He knew what this meant to me. I had never felt pain like this before. The loss crushed my soul.

Even though my entire world just collapsed around me, the tournament wasn’t over. I still had two more matches to wrestle in order to come back for third place. But I came to Champaign for one thing and one thing only – that bracket board. Anything less was worthless to me. Now I had a choice. Would I rollover and quit or would I fight back and win 3rd place?

When I came out for my next match I was a broken man. My family and coaches could see it in my eyes. Within the first 30 seconds of the match I got head-locked and thrown to my back. I was lucky enough to scoot out of bounds or I would have gotten pinned. Now I was down big early in the match. My coach yelled at me, “You better wake up and wrestle or you are going to lose!”

That lit a fire of fury and rage inside of me. I didn’t care if I won or lost anymore but I was definitely going out swinging. I was pissed. I clawed my way back to win that match and I was not nice about it. Then I won another big match for third place against a guy that had beaten me earlier that year. We did not like each other and I was not very nice in that match either.

At the award ceremony I stood in the 3rd place spot. Looking up at the champ standing on the top of the podium I was not happy. Actually was crushed. It hurt so bad because it mattered. That bracket board meant the world to me. If I didn’t sacrifice so much the loss wouldn’t hurt so bad. Looking back on that moment it still hurts but I move forward with my head held high.

I am proud of the way that I fought back and never quit. That experience has served as a catalyst for the rest of my life. Now I know that no matter how crushing of a defeat life might give, I will always fight back with fury. Even if I lose I will go down in a blaze of glory. Unless I am cold and dead, I will never quit. It is because of this memorable experience that I can march into any battle with confidence.

Perseverance

In life, no matter if we win or we lose there is always a tomorrow. The champ doesn’t stay on top unless he keeps getting better. The rest of the pack stays hungry. The defeated doesn’t stay at the bottom unless he quits. We live to fight another day and we never ever quit. Ever!

As a coach I and a parent I tell my kids every day – the most important thing is to KEEP GETTING BETTER! Stay humble in victory and know that no one is invincible. Enjoy the success but then get right back to work. Stay confident in defeat. Even though it hurts, great champions have short memories. Only remember the things that will make you better. Forget the rest and get right back to work. 

When a great warrior reaches the mountain top he keeps his head down. Not because he lacks confidence but because he is truly humbled by the moment and grateful for all those that sacrificed to help him get there. When the warrior is in the deepest valley he keeps his head held high. His eyes look up for help when he needs it. In his heart he remains confident because he knows that no matter how bad the current situation is, he will persevere. He will grow stronger as he keeps moving forward.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: 

Carson Beebe – retired college wrestler, pro MMA fighter. Current youth wrestling & MMA fight team coach. To learn more about Carson, please visit www.beebetrained.com